Friday, February 11, 2011
Vida
Learning how to make the most out of life is something I am learning to become well versed at lately. I am continually in state of amazement and fog about all the new and ever changing variables around me. While I have only been for a week it feels like I have experienced many life times since my arrival. Each day has a certain amount of unpredictability. I am creating some routine with my Spanish classes and working with the children, however things are constanlty shifting in one direction or another. I have recomitted myself to lean on my spiritual practice as most of the people around me do not know what I am saying! Recently I have been questioning the spiritual deity or deities that be. Wondering why things turn out a certain way that leads to pain or loss? I usually do not receive answers to these types of inquiry, and instead I am left to dig a little deeper and find within the message. This entails many layers of barriers, but yesterday I sat on the mountain and prayed a deeper prayer than I have in a long time and pushed beyond my usual barriers. I realized that life is sometimes cruel and painful and while it doesn´t make any sense in the end hopefully things fair better. I really hope and pray that is true. In the end I hope everyone that I love gets their fairytale and happy beginning, middle, and end.
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I'm going to guess that "vida" means life? que? I'm glad the routine starts to take hold, which opens up the space for spiritual exploration. I believe that God is less a diety that can be anthromopized (imagined with human qualities) than an all pervasive presence. I also believe that not everything happens for a reason. After all, we have free will and sometimes my doing something intersects with your life. I don't believe God "wills" that, but sometimes, crap happens. The important part to me is that God is with us in our suffering and pain, hurting with us (to do a Little anthropomorphizing!) God never deserts us, good times or bad, and is with us in both. This has been a hard lesson in my life, and while i never spent three months ina foreign culture, I have had some VERY difficult times in the US that have taught me that lesson. Know that you are God's Beloved!!! And you are never left alone! God is with you on your journey...emotional and physical!
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